Saturday, May 20, 2017

Pure Love

I got a phone call from my mother-in-law on the last day of December, 2014, New Year’s Eve.  Her voice was hoarse and gravelly.  She had the flu since Christmas.  “Would you please go to the plant nursery for me and pick up my free mulch?  My coupon expires today.  I would have done it myself, but then I got sick.”

I did the math.  I had already decided that I was too sick with my own congestion and raw throat to go to the Solemnity of Mary Mass, however, I could probably run this errand for her.  Plus, she melted my heart by calling me an endearing name used by very few people that know me – my mom, husband, and beloved deceased grandfather.

So, I got into my pyrite-colored truck, and drove to her home ten minutes away.  She was laying on her couch in front of the T.V., covered in a crocheted afghan.  “The coupon is behind you on the kitchen table.  Will your kids be able to spread the mulch under my plants?  There’s supposed to be a freeze tonight.”

“No, my kids tested positive with the flu, the virus strain that was not covered by the flu shot.  I don’t have the energy to spread it either, I’m still under the weather...”  I could tell she was worried about her xeriscape plants - thirty planted in her front yard, and another thirty in her backyard.  There were red and purple Lantanas; Soft and Red Yuccas; Ocohoi and Variegated Agaves; Cacti, like Spineless Prickly Pear; a hot pink Crepe Myrtle; several Upright Rosemary plants; a magenta Knock Out Rose; a Mexican Bird of Paradise; Autumn and Blue Sages; yellow Bulbines; a Crinum Lily; two Persimmon Trees; two Cenizos; a purple Mountain Laurel; Turk’s Caps; Butterfly Irises; yellow Esperanzas; Mexican Mint Marigolds; Skull Caps; Inland Sea Oats; and Oregano, Duranta, and Damianita plants.  As I was leaving, I said, “I’ll just put the bags of mulch in your garage.”

I drove to the plant nursery, about twenty minutes away, and picked up six bags of cedar mulch, her favorite kind.  During the drive there and back, the Lord was working on my heart.  I kept thinking about some words that Jesus spoke to Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska, number 1489 in her Diary, “A single act of pure love pleases Me more than a thousand imperfect prayers.”

I thought, “When have I ever performed an act of pure love?”  Then, from the depths of my soul, I heard a very tiny whisper.  It was Mary, my holy Mother.  She said, “What if you spread the mulch?”  At first, I balked at the idea.  But, I’m sick.  “You’re not that sick.”  But, I’m allergic to cedar.  “Only to the pollen.”  But, I’m wearing a white coat, and I have no gloves.  “You can wash later.”

By the time I got back to my mother-in-law’s home, it was 37 degrees outside, and dropping.  I really did not want to get my hands dirty, even just to pull the two cubic foot bags into her garage.  Then the thought occurred to me that spreading the mulch would really be an act of pure love!  All of a sudden, the idea became irresistible.  I’m gonna do it!

            I pulled one of the bags of mulch off the end of the truck and tore a hole in the top of it.  I leaned it against the back tire and plunged my hands into the shredded wood and dirt.  I grabbed as much mulch as I could hold with my bare hands, and stooped down to spread it around the bottom of a spiky yucca plant.  I spread the mulch around a dozen plants, pulled down another bag, and leaned it against the front corner of her home.  As I was tearing a hole in the top of the second bag, a chilling breeze ran across my fingers.  I noticed that if I kept my hands inside the plastic bag just a few seconds longer before pulling out the mulch, my hands would not feel cold as quickly.  I wasn’t sure that I could keep this up.  I began to doubt that I would be able to spread the remaining five bags of mulch.

            Then I think a miracle happened.  It seemed as if the temperature rose a few degrees.  My hands weren’t cold anymore.  I kept working.  I felt as if Mary’s angels were helping me along.  My work became easy and light.  I had such an overwhelming joy in my heart, and an even greater love for my mother-in-law!  An hour and fifteen minutes later, I finished spreading all six bags of mulch in the front and back yards.  Instead of pulling the six heavy bags of mulch into her garage, I put the six empty bags into her trash can.

            I decided not to tell my mother-in-law what I did.  After rinsing off my hands the best I could with her hose, I drove home in enough time to make dinner for my family.  My heart was soaring!  I realized that the miracle was not only in the physical circumstances, but also the fact that the Lord gave me such a deep and pure love for my mother-in-law!  I marveled in the knowledge that what I did for her pleased Jesus more than praying a thousand imperfect prayers for her salvation!

            The next day, I got a phone call from guess who.  She told me the story of how she looked out of her window that morning at her Persimmon Tree and thought, “Poor tree, you are going to die.”  Then she looked down at the base of the tree and, seeing the mulch, said, “Oh!  You’re not going to die!”  She asked me, “Who did the labor?”

            I said, “I did.  Merry Christmas!  I love you!!”

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Playing on the Beach with Jesus

            “Allow Me to permeate every aspect of your life… I’m going to offer Myself through you to My Father.”  These were Jesus’ Words to my heart during Eucharistic Adoration last Saturday morning, May 6, 2017, from 6:00 – 7:00 a.m.  I was just soaking in God’s loving, holy presence for an hour before He spoke to me.  Wow!

            I still don’t understand fully what these words mean.  All weekend I’ve been laying my heart bare for Jesus to change me, realizing that I can’t do this on my own.  Only God can change me.  Only God can heal me.  All I know is that Jesus has a firm grasp on my heart, and He is ever so delicately and tenderly performing spiritual surgery on my soul.

            I went to confession at 3:30 p.m. last Saturday.  For my penance, I was told to read John, chapter 15.  “I am the vine, you are the branches.  Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing… As the Father loves me, so I also love you.  Remain in my love.”  John 15:5,9

            The thought occurred to me last weekend that one way Jesus could offer Himself to His Father through me is to so fill my heart with knowledge of His Love for me, that it would spill over into small acts of sacrificial love for those around me.

            I think this is what happened to me in the middle of the night, very early, on Monday morning.  I woke up about 3:00 a.m., and decided to spend some time with my Lord.  In prayer, I could see Jesus with the eyes of my heart.  He was holding both of my hands in His Hands, and looking so lovingly into my eyes.  I knew He wanted me to go with Him to show me something, like He often does when I pray.

            For some reason, when He tried to gather me up in His Arms, like He would hold a little girl, I was very heavy, like the fifty-five pound bag of dry dog food that I buy, and can barely lift into my car.  I was having difficulty just abandoning myself to the Lord.  My heart was not light, and filled with His Love and Joy and Peace.

            Praise God that Jesus never gives up on me!  He never stops trying to get His Love through to me.  He never stops permeating me with His Love!

            Instead of picking me up, Jesus gently led me by the hand.  I could see myself as a little girl walking hand in Hand with Jesus on a beach, along a seashore, taking me on a journey.

            In prayer, when Jesus wants to heal me, and fill me with His Love and His Peace, He takes me to the beach!  This time Jesus took me all the way back to when I was conceived!  On the return journey, Jesus showed me how He always loved me, no matter what was happening in my life.  Jesus laid a foundation of Love, imprinted on my soul, filled in with beautiful beaches stretching back to my farthest memories.

            Jesus showed me this one contiguous beach that spanned my whole lifetime, my past, present, and future.  Jesus has always loved me.  Jesus loves me now.  Jesus will always love me in the future!  Wow!

            I feel renewed in God’s Love for me.  I feel that Jesus has given me a whole, new, fresh beginning in my walk with Him, a deeper conversion.  I feel healed.  I feel whole.  Praise God!

            Jesus asked me, “So what do you want to do now?”  I said, “Let’s play on the beach!”

Words of Encouragement for Men's ACTS Retreat May 11-14, 2017

5/10/17   6:19 a.m.

“Oh, My Children!  I am here for you now.  I have gathered you into My Arms, My Loving Arms of Grace.  You are with Me now, in a beautiful union.  I am in you, and you are in Me.  You are totally immersed in My Love, My Ocean of Love and Mercy.”

“My Child, I am here for you now.  I open My Heart to you.  I pour forth My Precious Blood upon you, the Blood that I shed on the Cross for you.  Only My Blood can wash away your sins, and purify you as white as snow.  Only My Body, given up for you, can nourish your starving soul.”

“I came that you may have life, My Eternal Life, abundantly.  I am the Fountain of Life that wells up within you to eternal life in Heaven.”

“Walk in Me.  Walk in My Love.  Remain in Me.  Remain in My Love.  You will be My Walking, Breathing Heaven on Earth.”

“Keep My Holy Words in your heart.  Draw your strength from Me.  I will be your courage.  I will be your strength to do My Father’s Holy Will, to do what is righteous and true, to walk in My Ways, to love tenderly, to speak kindly, to humbly follow Me.”

“I will lead you.  I will guide you.  You are My Brother.  I call you My Friend.  I call you by name.  I will always be here for you.  I will never leave or forsake you.  You are Mine, and I am yours.  You have Me now deep in your heart and soul.  I am with you now.”

“I fill you with My Holy Presence.  I fill you with My Holy Spirit.  I fill you with My Whole Being.  I am your Love.  I am your Peace.  I am your Joy, welling up from within you.”

“I delight in you, My Precious One.  Find your delight in Me.  Seek My Face, and you will find Me.  Knock on the door to My Heart, and I will open My Treasures for you.  I will bless you with My Gifts of the Holy Spirit.  I will heal you.  I will restore your soul.  I will purify you, and make you holy in My Sight.  I will reveal My Love for you.  I will take you by the hand, and walk with you.  You will be My Beloved Son, and I will be your God!”

“I love you, My Child, I love you.  I bless you, My Child, I bless you.  Halleluia!  Halleluia!  Amen!!” 

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Journal Entry - Day 3

Friday, Jan. 20, 2017 - Inauguration Day (1st Day of Donald Trump’s Presidency)

Our Lectio Divina Prayer Group decided to go to Mass and pray the rosary for peace in our nation and in the world, instead of having our regular meeting this morning.  I couldn’t go to the Mass because of a family obligation, however, I was able to join my friends for the rosary.

By the time I arrived at the daily chapel, I felt so unworthy to be there.  During the Sorrowful mysteries of the rosary, I couldn’t help crying.  In prayer, I saw Jesus with the eyes of my heart just gather me up like a little girl in His Arms.  He just held me.  Then he blessed me with His Forgiveness and Mercy and Love!

I felt so incredibly loved, even though I knew I didn’t deserve it.  Jesus washed away my sins.  I invited Him into my heart and soul.  I saw Mary, my holy Mother of God, standing in front of my heart, which looked like open doors to a tabernacle, where Jesus was residing.  I felt such deep, deep peace and love.  I felt that Mary was blessing me with the answer to my prayer, “Please help me to see God’s love for me today.”

I stayed for Eucharistic Adoration after the rosary, just soaking in God’s Holy Presence, and His Holy, Holy, Holy love in my heart.  A good friend of mine started cleaning the daily chapel.  She gave me two glass candle holders to keep, so special!  They looked like tall, clear drinking glasses with a cross etched in the glass. 

My friend said she usually throws them away when she replaces them with new ones, but she said I could have them.  She poured a small amount of remaining hot wax from one of the glass candle holders into the other one.  These candle holders were next to the tabernacle day and night, next to Jesus’ Holy Presence in the Eucharist!  How special!  What a blessing!  Praise God!!

Easter Gift


Ezekiel 37:21-28

“Tell them:  Thus speaks the Lord God:  I will take the Israelites from among the nations to which they have come, and gather them from all sides to bring them back to their land.  I will make them one nation upon the land, in the mountains of Israel, and there shall be one prince for them all.  Never again shall they be two nations, and never again shall they be divided into two kingdoms.

No longer shall they defile themselves with their idols, their abominations, and all their transgressions.  I will deliver them from all their sins of apostasy, and cleanse them so that they may be my people and I may be their God.

My servant David shall be prince over them, and there shall be one shepherd for them all; they shall live by my statutes and carefully observe my decrees.  They shall live on the land which I gave to my servant Jacob, the land where their fathers lived; they shall live on it forever, they, and their children, and their children’s children, with my servant David their prince forever.  I will make with them a covenant of peace; it shall be an everlasting covenant with them, and I will multiply them, and put my sanctuary among them forever.

My dwelling shall be with them; I will be their God, and they shall be my people.  Thus the nations shall know that it is I, the Lord, who make Israel holy, when my sanctuary shall be set up among them forever.”